Apostophes are a labor of love

Valentine's Day is coming. And you know what that means. Lots of exciting, passionate, thrilling talk about possessives -- specifically, the use of possessives in holiday names. (If you know something I don't here, it's probably best that you don't mention it.)

All across the nation, couples will come together this Valentine's Day to explore questions such as: Is there an apostrophe in Valentine's Day and where does it go? Is it the same for Saint Patrick's Day? Because that's coming up too and we still haven't figured out whether an apostrophe belongs in Presidents Day. And what about Mother's Day? And what about New Year's? Not to mention the confusing mixed messages of Guy Fawkes Day and Orangemen's Day.

Yes, for many people -- especially certain word nerds -- Feb. 14 truly is that exciting.

I always say that possessives are like a box of chocolates. Just when you think you're getting them, you realize you were deluding yourself.

Like most language matters, possessives are based on very simple rules with very frustrating exceptions. And nowhere are these exceptions more annoying than in holiday names.

To make a possessive, in most cases you just add an apostrophe and an s. A day dedicated to your Valentine is Valentine's Day. Roses you give to your girl become your girl's roses.

But what about a day that honors not just one very deserving female in your life, but numerous different people at once, say for example a couple of notable presidents? Again, we start with a simple rule: To make a possessive out of a plural noun that already ends in s, just add an apostrophe at the end. No extra s is needed. That's why it would make sense to write Presidents' Day and, indeed, why my dictionary says you should. But could the Associated Press leave well enough alone? Fat chance. Their official style, which most newspapers follow, is no apostrophe. Just Presidents Day.

So you'd think that AP would have some pretty strong advice on the subject of Saint Patrick's Day, right? Wrong. AP doesn't even have an entry for the holiday (a fact I find even more irksome because it happens to be my birthday, yet another day rife with opportunities for disappointment). So I must defer to the dictionary spelling that uses not just an apostrophe but a completely spelled-out "Saint."

In other words, yes it's his day and no you can't short-change him on his hard-earned title (unlike that Valentine guy, whose saint title is as hard to detect as some men's emotions).